Thursday, June 2, 2011

Stretching the Truth

I had a co-worker, when working at the Dallas Morning News, who put in his resume that he had attended a certain prestigious college. He confided in me that he had just "walked through a few buildings while visiting the campus" one summer. He told me he could pass a lie detector test if need be. I have another friend who claims to visit royalty often. Come to find out, he justs eats at Burger King and Dairy Queen on weekends. In Dallas, there used to be a Mars Music Store. I could truthfully say I have been to Mars and back...but, that would be misleading. (No one ever believed me anyway...even with my space helmet on.) Back when I was in a rock band, I used to take credit for playing on the records the band had made - before I ever joined them. 
Have you ever "told a tale" that was partially true? If you say you haven't you are lying! Have you ever torn down the wall between imagination and information to make you look better in someone's eyes or to impress someone you're dating? If you have, remember, confession is good for the soul.   

17 comments:

  1. I have a pastor friend who joked about naming his bed "The Word", so he could tell people "I've been in The Word all morning..."

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  2. I once had a pastor who loved sailing. He named his sailboat "Visitation." So whenever people called for him at the church office while he was out sailing, his secretary told them that, (you guessed it.) he was out on visitation.

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  3. Wow, I should have that imagination. I have never named by bed, and I named by boat Shadowfax.

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  4. As Paul once said with that amazing Biblical-author realism, "Let God be true, though every person is a liar."

    When I was a teenager, my Dad had a cherished ping pong table (don't laugh). He would shine it up with Armor All and admire it (I said not to laugh). In the same room, he had a miniature executive dartboard set. Can you guess who threw the dart short of the board and made a chip in the middle of the beloved, shiny ping pong table ... and then refused to admit it when asked?

    I feel much better now.

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  5. A half truth is a complete lie.

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  6. Anything but the 100% truth is 100% lie.

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  7. There is a bar called, "THE OFFICE" in a city nearby.

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  8. I agree with Joel and Michael...and I'm an Arminian! Based on this fact, and knowing that most "jokes" are nothing but lies, your blog, sir, is the color of sin. Repent and be 100% honest with your humor. If it never happened then say so, you bearded baboon.
    Thank you.

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  9. "...bearded baboon..."
    That wasn't very nice.

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  10. Your child begins screaming and crying in the middle of the night. You rush into their room and they begin grinning at you. 'They go astray as soon as they are born, speaking lies.' Ps. 58:3

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  11. Ever run into someone who's been really sick and you tell them, "We've been praying for you" and you haven't even thought of them? Yeah, me too. Hey Eddie, today is my parents 60th wedding anniversary, and that's no lie.

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  12. Chris, be sure to let your parents know I said congratulations on the big 6-0.

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  13. Well, bearded baboon goes right next to princess bigfoot in my insult toolbox now.

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  14. ...at camp in 1980, I spoke with a terrible Australian accent and told all the other kids that I was from the land down under...

    hm... that does feel better.

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  15. I really don't want to think about the times I have stretched the truth...

    So, I'll add to your story about being in the rock and roll band and point out that uber-guitarist Steve Howe actually appeared on the cover of a Yes album (Time and A Word) that was recorded before he joined the group. This wasn't his fault, but look on the cover at the worried look on his face (back row, right end):

    http://bit.ly/koBbBh

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