Vulture: Ah Ms. Cow, how good to see you. Returning from church I see. How was the preaching today?
Cow: Mooooving.
And what, prey tell, did your pastor preach on?
Cow: Moooooovie
Vulture: Ah yes, a video clip. How enchanting. Is yours a seeker friendly church?
Cow: Moo
Vulture: I'll take that as a yes. Are you a seeker, Ms. Cow?
Cow: Mooooove.
Vulture: I see you are. Yes, I will get out of your way. Perhaps you would like to share a bite of my dinner before you pass by. It may be hard to recognize, but it is the previous preacher from down the road. Very tasty...not any meat, just lots of fluffy filling. I dare not eat to much at once, or I will upset my tender stomach.
Douglas Moo, professor of New Testament at Wheaton College, leaned over the lectern in his characteristic vulture-like posture, glaring at the students.
He had just begun to instruct the class concerning the best approach to take when they preach from Ephesians 5:25 & 26 on husbands loving their wives. Sudenly, a sheepish look came to his face as his eyes fell upon words in the text, "washed with water" and he realized that he had forgotten to wash the breakfast dishes that morning, as he had promised his wife he would do.
Traveling inflatable toupee salesman and itinerant heretical preacher, Turk E. Vulture, prided himself on being able to preach a sermon on any subject targeted to any audience provided the price was right, "I dishes out whatever they wants to hear" was his motto. HIs finest moment was when he was asked to asked to give a devotional talk to the National Association of Dairy Farming Frank Sinatra Fans The title of his homily?
Doing dishes after steak No moo was heard after that night The green peace prophets they did preach But vultures gathered on the site.
I don't know why these greenies groan Like I would listen to their warning They should try meat without moaning With one less cow, less global warming.
The Cow and the Vulture
ReplyDeleteCow: Mooooove
Vulture: Ah Ms. Cow, how good to see you. Returning from church I see. How was the preaching today?
Cow: Mooooving.
And what, prey tell, did your pastor preach on?
Cow: Moooooovie
Vulture: Ah yes, a video clip. How enchanting. Is yours a seeker friendly church?
Cow: Moo
Vulture: I'll take that as a yes. Are you a seeker, Ms. Cow?
Cow: Mooooove.
Vulture: I see you are. Yes, I will get out of your way. Perhaps you would like to share a bite of my dinner before you pass by. It may be hard to recognize, but it is the previous preacher from down the road. Very tasty...not any meat, just lots of fluffy filling. I dare not eat to much at once, or I will upset my tender stomach.
Cow: You got that right.
Opps! Left out a line!
ReplyDeleteAfter "pass by." in last vulture diolgue, should be the sentence: "It is one of the more interesting dishes I have found on the road here."
Sorry for the good!
Douglas Moo, professor of New Testament at Wheaton College, leaned over the lectern in his characteristic vulture-like posture, glaring at the students.
ReplyDeleteHe had just begun to instruct the class concerning the best approach to take when they preach from Ephesians 5:25 & 26 on husbands loving their wives. Sudenly, a sheepish look came to his face as his eyes fell upon words in the text, "washed with water" and he realized that he had forgotten to wash the breakfast dishes that morning, as he had promised his wife he would do.
Traveling inflatable toupee salesman and itinerant heretical preacher, Turk E. Vulture, prided himself on being able to preach a sermon on any subject targeted to any audience provided the price was right, "I dishes out whatever they wants to hear" was his motto. HIs finest moment was when he was asked to asked to give a devotional talk to the National Association of Dairy Farming Frank Sinatra Fans The title of his homily?
ReplyDelete"It had to be moo."
TBS Haiku
ReplyDeletePlease send your moo-la
Naive ears hear vulture preach
Dishes up deceit
moo dishes vulture preach
ReplyDeleteDoing dishes after steak
No moo was heard after that night
The green peace prophets they did preach
But vultures gathered on the site.
I don't know why these greenies groan
Like I would listen to their warning
They should try meat without moaning
With one less cow, less global warming.
Thanks everyone! These were great!
ReplyDeleteI love the smell of creativity in the morning.