Nigel's Book in Second Edition (#7)

According to Sola Bootstrapa, Pettibone's first edition of "Jabbers" has sold completely out! All 125 copies were bought up the first two weeks it hit the bookstores. So now, by the help of Benny Finney and his staff, the second edition will hit the bookstores this weekend. The print run on this volume will be a whopping 550. Here is another excerpt from NPTAAJAH&H:

"Hell is a lot like a Black Flag Roach Motel - the wicked check in, but they don't check out! It is not a subject that is easy to talk or write about, so I am making YouTube videos with professional actors. We need this to be as real as possible on this side of eternity. I have hired the screenwriter of the Davey and Goliath TV series to direct these films. Each will be about five minutes in length and will all end the same way...screaming and gnashing. Elvis Wesley will do the music score for each spot. We are presently trying to get Kevin Hart to narrate. The first webisode will be the story of a transgender militant atheist real estate agent who is killed by a falling baby grand piano. Oh yeah, I forgot to mention that the Hell sequences will be done in the wonderful artistry of the claymation team who brought you Gumby and Pokey." 

Hey! Hey! We're the Arminians!

The above Monkees Theme is the inspiration
for the new Arminian Theme song
written by that famous Arminian composer, Elvis Wesley:

Here we come
Walking down the street
We get the funniest looks from
The Calvin-ists we meet.

Hey, hey we're Arminians,
'Cause we say the sinner's just sick.
And we're too busy giving,
Those tracts made by Jack Chick.

We're just trying to be friendly,

Look at our ear-to-ear smile.

It's a Finney gener-ation,

We'll help you walk that aisle.

Hey, hey you're just wounded,

Not dead like the Calvinists say.

Decide to be-lieve and you're ready,

God will always meet you half-way.

Some Love to Hate

Finney Coffee Shop Fail

(from August of 2010 with modifications)

Tales from the Finney Flash

Fan Artist Displays Painting

Phlegm Boyant, professional oil painter, saxophonist and part-time judge, displays his newest work in a gallery outside of Boston. I am honored at such an honor, your honor. Thanks for sending me the photo and the news article, two days later, that reported the painting being sold to the highest bidder and then thrown in a dumpster. Sounds awful Finney to me.

Dialogue Dispute

Here is the challenge: These three busts above (Darwin, Finney and Spurgeon) have been placed together on a bookshelf by some ignoramus. Use your imagination and come up with a caption where one, two or all have something to say. This challenge will never end. I plan on using some, not all, (sorry, Arminians) to post with dialogue balloons and full credit to the humorist on this blog and my Facebook page during the months ahead. Good Providence to all the Calvinists who participate and good luck to all the Arminians and Semi-Pelagians who try their best.

Believe It or Get Out #2

Benjamin Bronkhorst Finney was instrumental in starting the first All-Arminian Church of the We're Not Huguenots and Never Will Be Fellowship of John the Revelator Apostolic Assembly and Half-Full Gospel Missionary Catherdral of Free Will Saints and Agape Day Care Center.
He once  traveled over five hundred miles  just to glove-slap a Calvinist who was washing pots and pans in the Church cafeteria.
His persecution of Calvinists was known throughout the land. He was the first Arminian to build straw men and shoot arrows in them. In every town he visited he left a straw man behind with this warning: Confess Freedom or be Imprisoned!
Benjamin Finney believed he would be crowned "King of the Oceans" by Queen Victoria before his 40th birthday. Historical records show that this would have occurred had not Finney tried to ride a zebra in the annual Arminian Alzheimer's Parade in Manchester.
Benjamin Bronkhorst Finney died in the arms of a Calvinist doctor one day before his 40th birthday!   

Arminian Antics #99

The Masked Arminian Pastor #15

Arminian Antics #92

Arminian Antics #91

Gift Idea

Dagg Attack

Fan Photo from Phoebe Shinloin

This photo of an ad clipped from a magazine at a U-Tote-Em store

 in Paris, Texas by Phoebe Shinloin is evidence that people

are starting to read Calvinistic Cartoons more. 

Love Letters

Finney's Nightmare

Benny Finney was afraid,

When on a pillow his head laid,

To dream of things like Romans 9;

Of Corky Velveeta and his kind.

Rejected Magazine Cover

Not all covers submitted are used. This cover almost made it to print.

Fan Photo from Sprinter McBee

Thanks Sprinter for sending in the old comic book page!

A check for $7,000 is on it's way...somewhere.

Fight Fans