Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Just for Laughs #160

Let's talk captions

34 comments:

  1. "Excuse me, did you say 'free will'?"

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  2. "What was that you said about John Calvin? Not that Servetus argument again!"

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  3. And to think of all those poor deceived souls they spend all their savings on those end of the world billboards. Oh if only they had made better use of their money and invested it somewhere it would have done some good like here at Saddleback!

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  4. "So, what do you guys think of John Piper and Rick Warren together?"

    (crickets...crickets...)

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  5. "And you wouldn't believe what Pastor Schaap taught about last week! It was one of the best sermons on making a decision for Christ I've ever heard!"

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  6. So many captions, so little time...

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  7. "Yes, yes, yes; I know I said May 21, but I was wrong. I got the math wrong, that's all. Just make sure you're preparing yourselves during this spiritual judgment because the world will really end on…"

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  8. "You switched from KJV to ESV? How could you?!"

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  9. His friends listened with rapt attention as he expounded to them his intention of turning "Your Best Life Now" into a feature-length motion picture starring Johnny Depp.

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  10. Man on the left: "Dear, what insanity made you desire to have hair in a fashion similar to Joyce Meyer's?"

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  11. Man on the left: "...and then the pastor and deacons broke out into the 'happy holy dance.' It was the most frightening thing that I have ever seen in my life."

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  12. "But Jesus died for EVERYBODY in the whole world..."

    -I've just got back from housegroup tonight where I received looks of horror/icy stares/ ridicule as I explained Limited Atonement in response to a comment like this (call me a cage-stage calvinist!)Feeling a bit down, as a lone Calvinist in a sea of Arminians...(at least both my ministers are Calvinists.)Coming to CC for encouragement...

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  13. "Well, I certainly noticed. Our new pastor candidate did not use the correct fork with his salad."

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  14. @ Michael

    Betcha can't combine all of your captions into one cohesive paragraph.

    I dare you. ; )

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  15. @Stranger: I accept.

    "Excuse me, did you say free will?" The lady asked, breaking the conversation. She continued: "What was that you said about John Calvin? Not that Servetus argument again!" The lady exclaimed. With the silence from the young woman at the table, she turned to the men who seemed to be Calvinist by appearance: "What do you guys think of John Piper and Rick Warren together?" She paused to let the cricket chorus begin. The men obviously weren't sure what to think about such an odd alliance. Then, the lady at the table shouted back: "And you wouldn't believe what Pastor Schaap taught about last week! It was one of the best sermons on making a decision for Christ I've ever heard!" Her eyes grew wide and she began to cringe, realizing she was the only one who actually listened to Jack Schaap in the group.

    Gave it a shot.

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  16. @Helen: Hope everyone here can be an encouragement to you, particular redemption is one of those doctrines that will certainly get you in trouble! Keep going.

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  17. @ Michael
    Thank you young man! (from a 50 year old who is perhaps old enough to know better!)

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  18. Man on left, whispering to woman on left: "Be careful about what you say around Samuel - he's one of them stoics. He deleted Desiring God off his Kindle after only reading the first chapter."

    Man on right (Samuel): "I have just written a new article; I dearly hope that all of you will check it out. It is available on my blog!"

    Woman on left: "STOIC!"

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  19. Nice job, Michael. I'm impressed! You deserve $7,000 from Eddie.

    (I never bet my own money : )

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  20. Stranger wrote, "I never bet vmy own money."

    Me neither. Eddie should give Michael two $7,000 checks. ;)

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  21. Well, it's nice to see such generosity with other people's money guys. My, so heartwarming. :-D

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  22. Man who looks like HC: "The word
    'guarantee' is not in the Bible, so I don't have any idea what it means. But the term 'judgment day' means just an ordinary day, like any other day. You can only learn these things by studying the Bible verrrrry, verrrry, caaaarefully."

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  23. @Helen
    My heart goes out to you, sister. I have been there. Fact is, I have been on the other side of the theological fence and can remember my reaction to hearing the doctrine of Particular Redemption for the first time. It was like I was tazed by a close friend! I struggled with these truths for many months before I surrendered to God's undiluted Sovereignty.

    I have loaned tapes on election and particular redemption by John MacArthur (who can explain it a lot better than me). I have given sermons on the subject by Spurgeon and still had the lamp of investigation turned on in my face...and that's better than the silent treatment. (that can happen too)

    "If Christ on His cross intended to save every man, then He intended to save those who were lost before He died. If the doctrine be true, that He died for all men, then He died for some who were in Hell before He came into this world, for doubtless there were even then myriads there who had been cast away because of their sins. . . That seems to me a conception a thousand times more repulsive than any of those consequences which are said to be associated with the Calvinistic and Christian doctrine of special and particular redemption. To think that my Savior died for men who were or are in Hell, seems a supposition too horrible for me to entertain" (Charles Spurgeon, "Autobiography: 1, The Early Years," p. 172).

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  24. In the "about me" part of my Blogger profile, one thing that I listed is Galatians 2:20, which speaks of Christ who loved me and gave himself for me.

    Now, if he loved me and gave himself for me in the same way that he loved and gave himself for the one who will finally hear the words from him, "Depart from me ye wicked; I never knew you," then those comforting words in Galatians have no meaning.

    Craig

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  25. Women on left to man who looks like HC:

    "So now you tell us that you failed algebra?!"

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  26. * Formal night on the Ligonier-Cradle to Christianity Cruise *

    “And then we went to the Roman Forum where Dr. Sproul pointed us across the street to the cistern where Paul was imprisoned awaiting execution. I tell you this is the trip of a lifetime.”

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  27. "I hear the new minster is a Calvinist. Does this mean that Bingo night is out and prayer meetings are back in? Heaven help us!"

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  28. @Spherical and Persis: Nice. :)

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  29. Thanks Eddie and Stranger.Feeling better already... I've been in serious trouble in the past for chucking grenades, these days I try to pull the pin ever so gently...

    @Spherical: I like it!

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  30. um hum....and then He said go and sell what you have and come and follow me. Can you believe the nerve of that guy?

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  31. You didn't actually say THAT did you? You may call it discernment, but we say your just a judgmental jerk. I say The Shak was a wonderful book that helped me understand the Trinity and I don't care if it is all wrong.

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  32. BTW, hang in there Helen. I was the lone Calvinist in my classes at an Arminian "Bible" college. Ah the things God uses to grow us.

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