With the remains of their dear billionaire-Uncle Strumple lying in repose in the coffin upstage, cousins Bingo and Kayo entertain relatives and other mourners at the memorial service.Later the jovial mood was to change when it was announced by Strumple's attorney that he had left his entire estate to Harold Camping's ministry. After attorney's fees, of course.
Though Michael Left (left) and Bob Wright (right) came from considerably different theological spectrums, one merely an Arminian, one an open-theist, they united together to raise money to defeat their political opponent, Sheriff Mart N. Luther.
"Hey, Bing, I think this is the best practical illustration Pastor Warren has come up with yet!""Keeps 'em interested, Danny. Who'd a thought the disciples on the road to Emmaus looked so spiffy?" Stage director: "In a few seconds we get the Hanes sisters to illustrate Mary and Martha!"
Two totally rad and relevant pastors perform the"Jesus Jig" in an effort to spice up their alter call.
In preparation for May 21st, Agents J and K sold all their earthly possessions... with the exception of their tuxedos.
Actually, our chaps aren't tapping anymore, they're doing choreography.
Nice ones, mates!
"So what does this have to do with the Bible?" "I dunno, something about prophets of Baal--just keep dancing!"
Barney and Jim demonstrate their rapture pose.
Danny Jaye and Bingo McDougal do an interpretive dance for the church they call, "The Two Witnesses of Revelation Right Here, Right Now".
Ink Slinger, does an "alter call" actually change anything?
Man who looks like HC: "The word 'guarantee' is not in the Bible, so I don't have any idea what it means. But the term 'judgment day' means just an ordinary day, like any other day. You can only learn these things by studying the Bible verrrrry, verrrry, caaaarefully."
Oops! Posted on the wrong thread!
Okay, this one is for this thread:It is a little known fact that John Piper and R.C. Sproul were once stage actors with a dance routine that never failed to thrill the crowds.
@Fake Coke Can: Very funny. :D
@Fake Coke Can: Since I'm not a Baptist, I see the word "altar" rather rarely... hence my accidental misspelling. ;)
I knew that you were the best partner for the dance-a-thon. Think of all the money we raised for children's home. So what if people look at us a little funny from now on...
@Inkslinger: I've been in Baptist churches all my life and I wish they would have "alter calls" as in, people actually being regenerated. I don't like altar calls at all, but, when the Holy Spirit isn't running things, they gotta do something!
Are you Presbyterian, Ink Slinger?
After Bing and Danny had finished the best song and dance routine the world had ever seen in order to convince the Lord to let them into heaven, the angels came and through them into the lake of fire prepared for the devil and his angels.
Ben and Bob Arminiu had been invited to speak at a revival in Sola Scripturaville. However, when someone in the crowd stood and pointed out their man centered gospel they locked arms and started the Rob Bell Shuffle. They had hoped their song and dance would be enough of distraction to help them avoid actually being held accountable for what they taught.
time for the.... altar call at our friendly seeker-sensitive local church