I'd really rather the school marm suck out the venom, doc.
"That Neo-Reformed chap got you good, didn't he, laddie?""Aye, so he did. Fast-draw Driscoll is a sly one..."
I don’t know if it’s in the parameter of the rules to put a balloon in, but I’ll give it a shot (pun intended):Cowboy balloon:"That’s the last time I do evangelism in Tulipville."Caption:Arminian Andy learns the hard way.
Say old-timer, can you help me figger this out? I invented this hyer salvation-watch that tells the time at which the wearer is certainly headed for heaven. I know I didn't say the sinner's prayer until about 2005, but the little hand on this dang thing is stuck on "predestined from the foundations of the world"
"I tol' you to stay outta that Arminian Bible study group.""All I did was quote Scripture!"
The cowboy isn't Roy Rogers, is it?
Doc: "How did this happen, son?"Dandy: "Well doc, I was at the big tent revival over on the east end of town. A few fellas got into an argument over predestination. Soon, fists started flying, and a few cowpokes pulled their six shooters."Doc: "And so you were shot in the fracas?"Dandy: "No Doc; only in the arm."
I'll answer my own question.......no. :) At first glance it looked like him, but on closer scrutiny, not really. ;)
The cowboy in the photo is Sunset Carson, a B-western star of the 1940's.
Next time Pastor Dillon tells ya to take yer hat off in church, Sunset, you better do it!
"But this ain't blood, son. It's, it's mushroom soup.""Yup, doc. This'll be the last time I speaks ill of Ma James green bean casserole, I tells ya."
Stranger and Persis have some of the best so far. Confessional's is pretty good as well.
Angus's is nothing to sneeze at either, my friend.
How many times do I has ta tell ya! just cuz a fella is carring around a statue of John Calvin and says he just read all of Edwards works does not mean ya can trust him!
Strange fellow right after he shot me he said don't worry love wins! and then he ran away?
Sunset thought he was a right fine doc at first but had second thoughts after contemplaitin' that toupee.
Doc: Well, son, that tree got you pretty good. You can worship God riding your horse through the woods, but if I were you I'd keep from lifting up my hands.
@Jim Pemberton: Nice one.*Gasp*! We had a famous singer visit us!!!
Doc: How'd this happen, young man?Cowboy: Well, sir, this fellah asked me if I wanted to go out and have some shots with him. I thought he was a Presbyterian like me, and the "shots" were going to be shots of whiskey in the saloon. Turns out he was an angry Arminian, and the next thing I knew I was facing off with him in the middle of the street. He shot me in the arm, but not before I lobbed my Romans 9 hand grenade and blew his free will to smithereens. He's repenting now, so it's all worked out for good in the end.
There were some great jokes in this thread, worth many a chuckle!Who says Calvinists don't have a sense of humor?
I says it!If humor was filthy lucre, you'd have no cents at all!
Luther the Cowboy: "When that chap said, 'Get on your knees and pray the sinner's prayer', he meant it, Doc."Doc Martin: "How come he only got your arm, son? Lousy shot?"Luther the Cowboy: "No, Doc, that ain't it; he said this was a 'warning shot.' Next time, he said he'd blow my no-good anti-evangelistic devil-music-listening too-low-standards too-high-standards brain to smithereens."Doc Martin: "Anti-evangelistic?"Luther the Cowboy: "Well, Doc, he didn't take a liking to my calling it 'the devil's prayer', and basically getting into a full-blown argument over the thing. That's when he started getting real unsociable."
@ THEOparadox"I thought he was a Presbyterian like me."LOL!! ROTFASMSOW**(Laughing out loud! Rolling on the floor and spewing my shot of whiskey.)
Michael Wong said..."Angus's is nothing to sneeze at either, my friend."Be careful not to sneeze around Angus. I don't think he's had his flu shot.
How true! Angus might have swine flu!
It's only a flesh wound Partner. Did not touch your soul.
I don't feel anything happening, Doc. Are you sure you got the recipe right fer this here miracle healing holy water snake oil?
"thats a nasty remonstrant you got there!but I have the right TULIP for ya'"