Friday, February 27, 2009

Little Known Quotes from Spiritual Giants part 5

"Jack the Ripper? No constable, I have never heard of him." - C. H. Spurgeon

"Yes, I had that tattoo removed months ago!"- John Owen


"I've been thinking about writing a Christian mystery novel." - John Calvin


"I need a stamp."- Cornelius Van Til


"Is that pudding on my jacket?"- A. A. Hodge


"I can't babysit tonight. I really need the time to finish my book."- Augustine


"That is the best gravy I have ever tasted!"- B. B. Warfield


"Yes, I plan on writing some scripts for the Lone Ranger. Why?" - C. S. Lewis


"Y'know the Boston Baked Beans candy? That was my idea first." - Thomas Boston


"I really love good music! Listen to this, it's by Slim Whitman."- R. C. Sproul


"Kill that spider! I hate spiders! Kill it!"- William Carey


"No, I won't paint this church house pink!"- A. W. Pink


"Look! I have just invented Pope on a Rope Soap! haha"- Martin Luther


"...and barber, please cut the hair growing on my ears."- Jonathan Edwards


"No, I wasn't looking at you...I was looking at him. It's my eyes y'know." - George Whitefield


"How many people here know my birthday falls on the same day as Spurgeons?"- John MacArthur

Fan Photo from Oscar Yeeky


Thanks Oscar for the photo of the 1909 ad from Eternal Life magazine. Proof that Calvinists had their own specially made vehicles back in the early part of the 20th century.

Thursday, February 26, 2009

Real Fan Photo


Our newest member, Michael Hampton, sent this photo his wife, Karen, had taken while they were driving in Oklahoma. This is the very first REAL fan photo sent to me. Michael and Karen, this just might qualify both of you for a $100,000 cash giveaway somewhere. I don't know exactly where that would be, but if you locate that $100,000 cash giveaway, please let me know so I can enter also. Thanks for the kind words and the photo! It's a doozy!

Chic & Gumbo

WANTED More Comments


The comments I receive here are GREAT! I read and re-read them every day. They give this blog the atmosphere it needs. So for the month of March, the one who comments the most will receive a certificate as best blog blabber for the month of March. Thank you all in advance. And I would like to thank those that have tuffed it out here. You are all special to me. really...no joke.

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Lyrical Miracle Contest # 5


In this contest you need to come up with words to match the tune,
"The Itsy Bitsy Spider".
If you don't know the tune, I'm sure Frank Sinatra
or George Beverly Shea recorded it at sometime...
you might check YouTube or Google it. (just kidding)
The chosen one will be announced on Sunday, March 1st.
So put on your theological hats and start writing!
In case of a tie, the winner will be chosen by the casting of lots.

Every Member a Voter

Caption Contest Winner #10

Congratulations Mr. Nelson!

Random Word Writing Contest #4


Write a paragraph or two using the following random words:
coffee, balloon, Narnia, crime
Entries may be any form of creatively written expression. Just be funny.
And give your piece a TITLE.
The winner will be announced on Saturday, February 28th
and will be awarded a
Calvinistic Cartoons Excellence in Random Word Writing Award.

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Lookalike Contest Winner


Announcing the winner of Calvinistic Cartoons'
"Eddie Eddings Lookalike" Contest!
Full-time Calvinist, Vernon T. Moison, of Kidneybean, Illinois, has won two subscriptions to the new magazine for 5-Pointers, "High Five Jive". Watch for your two copies to start arriving this week!

Fan Photo from Papa J. Feeny


Thanks for the magazine P.J., I wrote one of the stories and they didn't even send me a copy!

Calling All Calvinists!


Any true blue, Theocentric, God-fearing Calvinists out there? We need Calvinists who will persevere in a humor-oriented, sometimes straight to the heart relevant blog! We need 5-Pointers who have that love for Truth and love for comedic connections who are not afraid to stand up and say, "I am a Calvinist, not by choice, but by Grace!" Join with me and I will promise you this - - when I find that kind of blog, I will let all of you know.

Someone is killing Calvinists


This morning I had 42 followers...now, it's down to 40. The only explanation possible, once again, is murder. Someone out there is on the loose! I have contacted the CIA, the FBI, the BBC, AARP, RCA, NBC and a CEO. I only hope they catch this fiend before the roster drops to 39.

Monday, February 23, 2009

Little Known Quotes from Spiritual Giants part 4

"Oh yeah, it's Saturday night...I had better prepare my sermon for tomorrow!" - C. H. Spurgeon

"Where did I leave my pen?" - John Owen

"Do you not know how to play Tic Tac Toe?" - John Calvin

"Yes dear, you can have a bite of my ice cream cone." - Cornelius Van Til

"Father, my birthday is right around the corner, y'know." - A. A. Hodge

"No more, please, I have had plenty of pancakes today!" - Augustine

"Students, I'm taking Thursday and Friday off!" - B. B. Warfield

"Yes, I plan on writing some sketches for the Colgate Comedy Hour. Why?" - C. S. Lewis

"Ironically, I have never been to Boston." - Thomas Boston

"How about calling our magazine, 'Tabletalk'...after all, Luther is dead!"- R. C. Sproul

"Would someone please help me hang this tire to that tree limb?" - William Carey

"Oh no...It's Arminian Day in Canada!" - A. W. Pink

"I don't think you want to hear what I think about the Pope." - Martin Luther

"Hey there, Chief Rain-on-the-Neck." - Jonathan Edwards

"John Wesley, you have been eating onions and garlic again haven't you?!" - George Whitefield

"I am up for a game of Battleship...any takers?" - John MacArthur

Slumdog Calvinist


My thanks to Cyst Monroe for sending me this movie poster.

Sunday, February 22, 2009

Fan Photo from Angst Beopleman


Thanks for the photo, Angst Beopleman of Tumortown, Wisconsin! We will be sending you a free subscription to the new monthly Christian detective magazine, "The Calvinistic Crime Control Center Chronicles". The hard-hitting anthology of Calvinist criminologists who help rid the world of crime, one sin at a time!

Saturday, February 21, 2009

Not Just Head Knowledge


This old newspaper report was sent in by Samuel Moops who sold these hats door-to-door back in the 1930's.

Friday, February 20, 2009

A Sneak Peek


For the first time on any blog anywhere! A preview of the comic strip right below it!
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