A Colorful Cup of JO(kes)

Maybe we should be focusing less on Goldilocks and more on why Mama and Papa bear don't sleep in the same bed anymore.

I can still remember a time when I knew more than my phone.

Every time I take up exercising I meet new people. They're usually paramedics, but still, new people

My apathy is at an all time whatever.

How dare you incinerate that I don't know big words.

Darkest: the exact moment you’re trying to find your seat at a movie. 

Every time your kid starts crying when they don't get what they want, just say "I don't negotiate with terrorists."

Time: Don't spend it all in one place.

"I" before "e" except after "c" has been disproved by science.

I’m pretty sure if dogs could talk their most common phrase would be “Are you going to eat that?”

There may be no "i" in "team," but there are three in "narcissistic."

As I watched the dog chasing his tail, I thought "Dogs are easily amused." Then I realized I was watching the dog chase his tail.