Friday, February 12, 2010

A Message from Founder and President Mr. Eddie Eddings

First, I want to let you readers know that we haven't let up on the search for Corky Velveeta. We have called in several organizations to help locate his whereabouts. So far, only one clue has surfaced - a set of footprints that suddenly stop. No sign of a struggle. No sign of any other tracks either, horse, car or human. The horse he rented arrived safely back at the Cotton Adams Horse Rental and Used Book Store in Cipher, South Dakota of its own accord. We have the military and the police, along with Jews for Jesus and the entire staff at Banner of Truth looking for him. I have distributed hundreds of flyers and posters in Kuwait City and Dubai. One can be seen in the background of the photo here. 
Here is my offer, and this is real. I am not joking when I say that $10,000 will be rewarded to the person who actually locates (and delivers) the real Corky Velveeta, dressed in his Romans 9 grenade costume. 
Important please read: This is not a dead or alive bounty. He has to be returned to the McKinney, Texas Calvinistic Cartoons office to collect the ten grand. 
Have a nice day and happy hunting! 


  1. Boy,cartoon bloggin must be doing well for this economy for such a great reward for a cheesy plug in a ballistic suit!

  2. SamWise, few people know that cartoon bloggin' brings in millions each year. And what price can you put on one soul who needs our help? I would gladly pay this amount ten times over if it will bring Corky back safe and sound. I have to go, the bank is calling me for a loan.

  3. No, I will be in Kuwait for some time. But the Calvinistic Cartoons McKinney, Texas office is still up and running. We just installed a flux capacitor in my DeLorean for future entries.


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