"Just remember, when we get to that new Reformed church, we're immediately joining the adult Sunday School class and taking over all the discussion with rants against Calvinism. But what ever you do, don't mention "Calvinism" or "Reformed theology". Just talk about how God has to be the author of evil if this or that is true, and how God didn't make no robots, and how people who would believe this or that are just aggressively hateful."
Lets see if I've got this right: I'm dropping off Geoff and Edna at the old Sanctuary for the Traditional Service. Then to Building-C with Meghan, Lance and Mario for the Contemporary Praise Celebration. Troy, Jason and Madison are attending the Emergent Service at the Fellowship Hall. Chuy, Lupe and Bob to Room 2 for the Lithuanian Service.
And you two in the back are helping me prepare the coffee, lemonade and snacks.
Andy Arminius knew he would be int trouble with the rest of the carpool but he just couldn't bring himself to drive to the SBC church and hear God's sovereignty preached at him one more time. He was taking them to Denny's instead for an object lesson in free will.
We can't keep having church in this car. Our membership keeps growing and we're being baptized in sweat.
ReplyDeleteI don't think this is what the Bible meant by "with one accord".
ReplyDelete"Just remember, when we get to that new Reformed church, we're immediately joining the adult Sunday School class and taking over all the discussion with rants against Calvinism. But what ever you do, don't mention "Calvinism" or "Reformed theology". Just talk about how God has to be the author of evil if this or that is true, and how God didn't make no robots, and how people who would believe this or that are just aggressively hateful."
ReplyDeleteCrowded? Nah, you should see how the Ricardo’s and the Mertz’s packed for Hollywood; now THAT’s crowded
ReplyDeleteLets see if I've got this right:
ReplyDeleteI'm dropping off Geoff and Edna at the old Sanctuary for the Traditional Service.
Then to Building-C with Meghan, Lance and Mario for the Contemporary Praise Celebration.
Troy, Jason and Madison are attending the Emergent Service at the Fellowship Hall.
Chuy, Lupe and Bob to Room 2 for the Lithuanian Service.
And you two in the back are helping me prepare the coffee, lemonade and snacks.
Andy Arminius knew he would be int trouble with the rest of the carpool but he just couldn't bring himself to drive to the SBC church and hear God's sovereignty preached at him one more time. He was taking them to Denny's instead for an object lesson in free will.
ReplyDeleteThe pastor and his wife knew they weren't going on a retreat with the couple's class, there just wasn't enough gas in the car!
ReplyDeleteNow I knows that 8 1/2 mile-per-hour seems pretty slow... but it twice as fast as walkin'
ReplyDelete