Ron: It's true, I'm afraid. It's called the Calvin Code. John Calvin's picture was secretly removed from all US dollars and replaced with that 33rd degree Mason, George Washington... ___
Angie: Why is all of this money in Rick Warren's office safe, officer Ron?
Ron: It's 10% of his "Purpose Driven" royalties... he hopes it will keep him out of Pergatory. ___
Angie: Why do you and Nancy keep so much money in your home safe, Ron?
Ron: We're Arminians and we keep losing it...then getting it back...and losing it again...
Ron: Back in the day, it was called money, moolah, scratch, dough, bucks, and wompom. Obama blew up the US economy in 2011 and the US has been using Pesos ever since...
This one replaces an earlier entry where I had a typo...
Angie: Look, Ron! I don't believe it.
Ron: Yeah, it's called the Calvin Code. Someone secretly replaced John Calvin's picture on the One Dollar Bill with that 33rd degree Arminian, George Washington...
Nice balloon fills everyone! I must needs remind the participants that the rule is one balloon dialog only. Aside from that pesky regulation, 'tis been most gratifying.
I copied the rules from the first Balloon Talk so that everyone could read them:
Ever so often I will post a photo with an empty balloon for you to fill. Remember the Calvinistic Cartoons K.I.T. formula - Keep It Theological. I will pick one comment that I think is funny and fill in the balloon giving credit to the "winner". Don't worry about the size of the balloon, I can adjust it to your dialog. Just keep it short as possible. Only fill in the balloon - don't add other dialog from someone else in the photo. Have fun and enjoy the laughs!
Please, Mr. Eddings, post these rules more often. Our memory cards are well used and faulty at times.
Ron: See all of this money, Angie? I won a contest at Calvinistic Cartoons and received $7000 from Eddie. I have several ideas of how to use this money at our church. There are some legalists there however that want to restrict me to using ONLY ONE of my ideas...
I have to say that yoos guys wrote some funny stuff! I think we have several bubbles worth a $7000 check. Maybe Eddie will get his checkbook out this weekend. I hope he acts quickly before the $ loses more of its value...
I take that 8-0 to be a sideways face that is in shock. Why? I am just having fun. We don't need rules to have fun. Are you a legalist? Are you saying that I should stay in the parameters of what SOME think should be a requirement? What about MY freedom? MY joy? I rest my case.
Your actions are a rude disregard for what Eddie is trying to do. If you visited his home and ignored social ethics and just did whatever you pleased, I don't think you would be invited back, Ms. Freedom-at-all-costs. I don't want to sound mean, but your freedom song is off key. Every first grader has to learn to obey the teacher. What happened to you?
@Joel the Legalist: Get over yourself, huh? Get a donut, yeah, get a jelly donut. Go park the car or something, see? Just deal with yourself, just get out of my face!
Legalistic "Monergistic" types make me sick. Deeeeee-sgusting!
They got any coffee in this place? Just some coffee, a cup of coffee, and a donut, a jelly donut, see? Make that a dozen donuts, and a large coffee. Got that?
Angie: Look, officer Ron. Rick Warren keeps a copy of Rob Bell's Velvet Elvis in his safe next to his Purpose Driven money... Wait a miunute! What is John Piper's telephone number doing in here?
Ron: I don't know but here is a an autographed picture of the Jonas Brothers...
Angie: Ron, what's all those Desiring God Conference brochures doing amongst Rick Warren's Purpose Drive money?
Ron: It's called the Piper Code. Look carefully and you will see several anagrams. Rearrange the letters and it says "Rick Warren is doctrinal and sound"...
@Stalingrad Jenkins (Dorkins!): Oh, a tough guy, eh? It's time for an invitational hymn smackdown, boy! Watch it! @Mr. Timn the Loser: Timn, huh? Smells Calvinistic to me...
I once won second prize in a raffle (a trip to Queensland); and I won the National Service lottery (but missed the war); and according to a non-Calvinist forum owner I “found the golden ticket in the Wonka bar”; but never anything like this. Wow! I am so over the moon!!!
"I don't believe it...Even this guy's money has Romans 9 on it."
ReplyDelete"What a plot! This Roman Catholic priest has been keeping the money from the indulgences!"
ReplyDeleteLook at this book of prophecy, it says that "The one who acts with a monkey named Bonzo will someday be President." Who could that be?
ReplyDeleteThis money isn't real! Why, it's as spoofitious as Rob Bell's theology!
ReplyDeleteAnd remember, as we didn't work for this money we don't have to tithe on it either.
ReplyDelete"Eddie said he'd send us a $7,000 check, but he never did. I guess we'll just have to help ourselves from his secret vault."
ReplyDeletethe Ink Slinger
www.inkslingerblog.wordpress.com
"What was the passcode to this vault? 999, you say? Yep, he's definitely a Calvinist."
ReplyDeletethe Ink Slinger
www.inkslingerblog.wordpress.com
"So it's true! They *are* planning to introduce a series of bills featuring the face of John Calvin!"
ReplyDeletethe Ink Slinger
www.inkslingerblog.wordpress.com
WOW Pastor Joel(I have a hard time typing that)was right.
ReplyDeleteWe are having our best life now
@Scribe: Awesome.
ReplyDelete@THEOparadox: Haha! Great!
ReplyDelete"Finders keepers, losers weepers
ReplyDeleteI'm sure that's in the Message somewhere..."
Wow! You're right. We should lock away our money before the government gets to it. You know, you're pretty smart. You should run for president.
ReplyDeleteNice work, mates!
ReplyDelete"You know, I thought stealing was wrong until I read Love Wins. Then I learned I can just ignore stuff in the Bible I don't like!"
ReplyDelete@Persis: Haha! Great.
ReplyDelete@Joel: Awesome Rob Bell jab.
ReplyDeleteYou say we use these with Calvinopoly?
ReplyDelete@Michael: Glad you enjoyed it. :-D
ReplyDeleteAngie: Wow, Ron... where di all of this money come from.
ReplyDeleteRon: It is the result of my Trickle-Down Economics program. I'll bet you Goerge HW Bush doesn;t call it voodoo economics any longer!
_____
Angie: Wow, that's alot of money.
Ron: Yes, it's seed money for the new Jeanne Dixon library that Nancy is planning to build...
_____
Angie: Ron, why do you have so much money stashed away?
Ron: Nancy's horoscope said to plan for extremely high inflation in the future when a muslim president would crash our economy.
Angie: That sounds like Nostradamos...
Angie: Ron, I don't believe it!
ReplyDeleteRon: It's true, I'm afraid. It's called the Calvin Code. John Calvin's picture was secretly removed from all US dollars and replaced with that 33rd degree Mason, George Washington...
___
Angie: Why is all of this money in Rick Warren's office safe, officer Ron?
Ron: It's 10% of his "Purpose Driven" royalties... he hopes it will keep him out of Pergatory.
___
Angie: Why do you and Nancy keep so much money in your home safe, Ron?
Ron: We're Arminians and we keep losing it...then getting it back...and losing it again...
Angie: What is all of that stuff, Ron?
ReplyDeleteRon: Back in the day, it was called money, moolah, scratch, dough, bucks, and wompom. Obama blew up the US economy in 2011 and the US has been using Pesos ever since...
Angie: Aye Carumba!
__________________
OK, I'll quit now...
This one replaces an earlier entry where I had a typo...
ReplyDeleteAngie: Look, Ron! I don't believe it.
Ron: Yeah, it's called the Calvin Code. Someone secretly replaced John Calvin's picture on the One Dollar Bill with that 33rd degree Arminian, George Washington...
Nice balloon fills everyone! I must needs remind the participants that the rule is one balloon dialog only. Aside from that pesky regulation, 'tis been most gratifying.
ReplyDelete"I wonder how the church treasurers are going to explain this!"
ReplyDelete"I tell you what, we pass the plates enough times and we really make it good, don't we?"
ReplyDelete@ Truthinator - I was way to late on this one you beat me to the Jeanne Dixon comment, nice work!
ReplyDelete@Hoyle:
ReplyDeleteStill, rules are rules.
We need 'em
We heed 'em
We all should try
and read 'em
I copied the rules from the first Balloon Talk so that everyone could read them:
ReplyDeleteEver so often I will post a photo with an empty balloon for you to fill. Remember the Calvinistic Cartoons K.I.T. formula - Keep It Theological. I will pick one comment that I think is funny and fill in the balloon giving credit to the "winner". Don't worry about the size of the balloon, I can adjust it to your dialog. Just keep it short as possible. Only fill in the balloon - don't add other dialog from someone else in the photo. Have fun and enjoy the laughs!
Please, Mr. Eddings, post these rules more often. Our memory cards are well used and faulty at times.
Thanks.
Eddie,
ReplyDeleteYou smoked the legalists out of the woodwork. Rules, rules, rules... Yikes!
Relax people and enjoy life. Laugh. Isn't that the point of this blog... or is it against the rules?
Under grace,
T.
Ron: See all of this money, Angie? I won a contest at Calvinistic Cartoons and received $7000 from Eddie. I have several ideas of how to use this money at our church. There are some legalists there however that want to restrict me to using ONLY ONE of my ideas...
ReplyDeleteAngie: Probably Arminians...
@Stranger.stramge.land: If there is Calvinopoly, can pass Geneva, buy the Synod of Dort and put a seminary on it?
ReplyDelete@Truthinator: Haha!
ReplyDeleteI have to say that yoos guys wrote some funny stuff! I think we have several bubbles worth a $7000 check. Maybe Eddie will get his checkbook out this weekend. I hope he acts quickly before the $ loses more of its value...
ReplyDeleteHere is the dialog between the two in the photo. But later, after they are both at a tea house.
ReplyDelete-What kind of tea would you like?
-What are you having?
-Mountain tea.
-Same for me.
Thank you.
You know,
I understand what you're going through...
-...although I can't really explain it.
-Neither can l.
It's complicated, but I can understand that.
Thanks.
I heard that you turned down
your promotion. Everyone's shocked.
I hope I wasn't a factor.
Not at all.
Hope you like it. I didn't really want to be tied down to the actual photo. Also I decided to make it boring.
8-O.
ReplyDeleteI take that 8-0 to be a sideways face that is in shock.
ReplyDeleteWhy?
I am just having fun. We don't need rules to have fun. Are you a legalist?
Are you saying that I should stay in the parameters of what SOME think should be a requirement? What about MY freedom? MY joy?
I rest my case.
@Dina LaTrek:
ReplyDeleteYour actions are a rude disregard for what Eddie is trying to do. If you visited his home and ignored social ethics and just did whatever you pleased, I don't think you would be invited back, Ms. Freedom-at-all-costs.
I don't want to sound mean, but your freedom song is off key.
Every first grader has to learn to obey the teacher. What happened to you?
I am not a real person.
ReplyDeleteand I never got past the first grade. I am only six years old. and spoiled rotten.
ReplyDelete@Dina LaTrek: Hahahahahaha!!!!
ReplyDelete@Joel the Legalist: Get over yourself, huh? Get a donut, yeah, get a jelly donut. Go park the car or something, see? Just deal with yourself, just get out of my face!
ReplyDeleteLegalistic "Monergistic" types make me sick. Deeeeee-sgusting!
They got any coffee in this place? Just some coffee, a cup of coffee, and a donut, a jelly donut, see? Make that a dozen donuts, and a large coffee. Got that?
@Vinny:
ReplyDeleteThe pope called and he wants his funny hat back.
@Vinny C.
ReplyDeleteHey VC! Starbucks called and they want their espresso machine back!
Angie: Look, officer Ron. Rick Warren keeps a copy of Rob Bell's Velvet Elvis in his safe next to his Purpose Driven money... Wait a miunute! What is John Piper's telephone number doing in here?
ReplyDeleteRon: I don't know but here is a an autographed picture of the Jonas Brothers...
Angie: Ron, what's all those Desiring God Conference brochures doing amongst Rick Warren's Purpose Drive money?
ReplyDeleteRon: It's called the Piper Code. Look carefully and you will see several anagrams. Rearrange the letters and it says "Rick Warren is doctrinal and sound"...
@Mr. Timn: How did you get here?
ReplyDelete@Michael: I live here princess bigfoot.
ReplyDelete@Stalingrad Jenkins (Dorkins!): Oh, a tough guy, eh? It's time for an invitational hymn smackdown, boy! Watch it!
ReplyDelete@Mr. Timn the Loser: Timn, huh? Smells Calvinistic to me...
@Mr. Timn: It goes to "First Baptist Church Hammond." Awesomeness. :-D
ReplyDeleteLoving me some Hyles!
Mum, mum, I won! I Won!
ReplyDeleteI once won second prize in a raffle (a trip to Queensland); and
I won the National Service lottery (but missed the war); and
according to a non-Calvinist forum owner I “found the golden ticket in the Wonka bar”; but
never anything like this. Wow! I am so over the moon!!!
Thanks Eddie.
@Vinny Cappuccino: "Invitation Hymn Smackdown"?
ReplyDeleteHAHAHAHAHAHA!