Mr. Finney, I tried one of the spiritual conversation starters from that book. When I boarded an elevator, I asked a lady, "Are you going UP?" She slapped my face. "Maam, you don't understand," I explained, "I was referring to the Rapture. "I KNOW!" she replied. Then she slapped me again.
Dear Jake, Where did you go wrong? You didn't include the lily white poodle with the pink bow she was holding! If a woman is cuddling a small dog or cat - ALWAYS include her pet in the question. Here is an example from my own fruitful life:
"Maam, are you and your lovely pet Pomeranian going UP at the Rapture?" The lady smiles at me and says, "Why, yes WE are! Ain't that right my little snookums...you're so cute...yes, you are!"
No slap - AND she accepted my tract made especially for the occasion - "All Dogs and Cats go to Heaven."
Ahhh. A '57 Mercury is what I drove when I almost passed the test for my first drivers license.
ReplyDeleteMr. Finney,
ReplyDeleteI tried one of the spiritual conversation starters from that book. When I boarded an elevator, I asked a lady, "Are you going UP?" She slapped my face.
"Maam, you don't understand," I explained, "I was referring to the Rapture. "I KNOW!" she replied. Then she slapped me again.
Where did I go wrong?!
Jake
Dear Jake,
DeleteWhere did you go wrong?
You didn't include the lily white poodle with the pink bow she was holding!
If a woman is cuddling a small dog or cat - ALWAYS include her pet in the question.
Here is an example from my own fruitful life:
"Maam, are you and your lovely pet Pomeranian going UP at the Rapture?"
The lady smiles at me and says, "Why, yes WE are! Ain't that right my little snookums...you're so cute...yes, you are!"
No slap - AND she accepted my tract made especially for the occasion - "All Dogs and Cats go to Heaven."
Benny, you so smart...yes you are...yes you are! I wish you would come over to my house and do all my witnessing for me in the neighborhood.
DeleteHe sounds like an IFB.
ReplyDelete