Minced Oaths

Journey to the Center

Lyrical Miracles Chosen One #8

Good news / Bad news: John Lennon is no longer an atheist!

New Book Old Cartoon

Talk about pleasant surprises!...yesterday, when I got home from work, I had a small package waiting for me from Christianity Today International! It had a check made out to me and a complimentary copy of "Let My People Laugh", published by Thomas Nelson. It had within it's pages an old cartoon I did in 1988. Of all the clients I have worked for, Leadership magazine and Christianity Today have been the BEST by far! They have always been very generous and fair to their cartoonists. I get paid everytime they use one of my cartoons. Thanks guys! I needed it.

Shipwrecked

Caption Contest Winner #13

Read the other funny entries to this contest by clicking here...

or if you have the energy, you can scroll down and find it!

Hosea

Emerging From Their Village

Just in Case

Previously Unreleased

Lyrical Miracle Contest # 8

In this contest you need to come up with words to match the tune,

"Image" by John Lennon.
Even though I hated the lyrics, I always thought the music was beautiful.
Now it is your time to write it the way it should be written!
The chosen one will be announced on Thursday, April 30th.
So take your theological vitamins and start writing!

They Call Me "Spurs"

What if Spurgeon had been born in Texas?

Random Word Writing Award #6

Congratulations John Bird!
Fabulous use of random words!
Read the award winning story just by clicking here!

Create a Calvinistic Cartoon Caption # 13

Congratulations pilgrim mommy

for another outstanding caption!

Here's the picture! It is crying out for a blurb, balloon or caption.

Think of the best dialog or narrative for this illustration

and you, my friend, will win hands down! It is just that easy!

Hint: Hire some community actors to improvise

this scene in your living room.
Have them do this until an idea comes to you.

You may win the contest and in the process make a few new friends!

Winner will be announced on Tuesday, April 28th

The Calvin 500

Sharing your faith has never been easier!

Now you can share your faith while you share your lunch!
Comes with a FREE reprint of that Time magazine article
about Calvinism being one of the major world influences
today and a CD featuring the smooth sounds
of the John Calvin Trio.

Earth Day Award

The Journal of Cotton Adams # 9

To his brother Clay, then a student at Yale college, New Haven.

Dear brother Clay, April 30, 1739.

I should tell you, "I long to see you," but that my own experience has taught me, there is no happiness, and plenary satisfaction to be enjoyed, in earthly friends, though ever so near and dear, or in any enjoyment, that is not God himself. Therefore, if the God of all grace would be pleased graciously to afford us each his presence and grace, that we may perform the work, and endure the trials he calls us to, in a most distressing tiresome wilderness where I am satisfied with but the memory of you. I also seem to remember you owe me twenty dollars.

I traverse in the most lonely melancholy desert, about ten miles from Motown, Kentucky; for the pending storm always makes me feel this way. I am now boarding with a poor Scotchman, Bagpipes McGee. His wife can talk scarce any English but, she plays the banjo like a monkey on a piano. Their home is very tidy and the lizards help keep the insect population to a minimum.

My diet consists mostly of hasty pudding, sunflower seeds and bread baked in the shape of a sundial. (If it gets cooked too long, they use it to tell time.) Sometimes I get a craving for an entire chicken and a basket of fries, a watermelon, a coconut pie and a pound of cheese.

I took time off from my circuit riding to catch up on my studies, sermon preparations and letter writing. I have prepared a sermon dealing with the pale horse in the book of Revelation who has power over a fourth of the earth, to kill with sword, and with hunger, and with death, and with the beasts of the earth. I call it, "A One Horse Open Slay".

As I was in prayer just now, I realized you do not owe me twenty dollars. You owe me twenty five!

I remain,

Your affectionate brother,

Cotton Adams

Death's Younger Brother

Emergent Animation

Attention Spurgeon Fans!

In MCMXCVII, I came out with a book entitled "More Awesome Truth - The Painless Way to Wisdom". You can now buy it on line for a few dollars. On page 60 of that book, I published, for the very first time what you see above. Certified copies of Spurgeon's Marriage Certificate and the certified copy of Spurgeon's death certificate. I have them both at 150 dpi so you can click on it and print it if you choose. BTW, ANYONE visiting London can ask to see the ORIGINALS at the General Register Office! I'm not kidding.

Flowery Speech

Save your eyes and click on the cartoon!

Random Word Writing Contest #6

Write a paragraph or two using the following random words:

bookmark, scorpion, moon, pulpit

Entries may be poetry, prose, fiction, essays or interviews.

(or any other form of creatively written expression.)

Just be funny, clever and theological...

and give your piece a TITLE.
The winner will be announced on April 24th

and will be awarded a
Calvinistic Cartoons Excellence in Random Word Writing Award.

Hang it on your wall or use it as a placemat!

And God Speed!

Click on painting for detailed view

This is a marvelous painting by Edmund Blair Leighton
entitled, "God Speed".
I took the liberty of photoshopping my face,
as well as my wife's, on the two main characters.

Mixed Up Game

Tragic Creation

This is what happens when man gets a mind
to modify God's Word to suit his own fallen will.

This idea came to me after reading "The Potter's Freedom"
by James R. White (A Defense of the Reformation
and a Rebuttal of Norman Geisler's Chosen But Free).

Chic & Gumbo in Three's

Napoleon Dunamis

Christian Tattoo Parlor

To get the full effect of the window displays

please click on any of the windows in the photo!

Happy Resurrection Day!

Fundamentally, our Lord's message was Himself.
He did not come merely to preach a Gospel;
He himself is that Gospel.
He did not come merely to give bread;
He said, "I am the bread."
He did not come merely to shed light;
He said, "I am the light."
He did not come merely to show the door;
He said, "I am the door."
He did not come merely to name a shepherd;
He said, "I am the shepherd."
He did not come merely to point the way;
He said, "I am the way, the truth, and the life."
J. Sidlow Baxter

That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus,
and shalt believe in thine heart that God
hath raised him from the dead,
thou shalt be saved.
(Rom. 10:9)

Chartbuster

Strange Days Indeed

The Church is in need of Bunyans!

AFI's Number One Musical

So You're Not Talkin' heh?

"Calvinistic Cartoons needs some comments on it's entries

...and you're gonna talk, ya hear me?...oh, tough guy eh?

What do you want, another blog blabber award?"

Open Theist President

Calvinistic Cartoons on the Radio!

Recieved a letter from a friend of this blog who let me know that Wretched Radio with Todd Friel is using some of my material on the show. I caught a little of it (they loop the 2 hour program until the next live show is on)

Thanks guys! It's an honor!
http://www.wretchedradio.com/

...well, they now have me as a daily listener!

They read some of my "wives of spiritual giants" quotes:

http://calvinisticcartoons.blogspot.com/2009/03/little-known-quotes-from-wives-of.html

...and did a "dramatized skit" using my interview with (ficticious) Pug Dagitt as the script:

http://calvinisticcartoons.blogspot.com/2009/03/interview-with-pug-dagitt-emergent.html

If you guys are reading this - I would love to post an audio clip of the Pug Dagitt interview and/or the wives quotes here at Calvinistic Cartoons!

Location Location Location

Caption Contest Winner #12

Eddie Eddings Experiences Organ Transplant Failure

Well, I sold my old Hammond Electronic Organ today...

but, the movers delivered it to the wrong address.

Sneak Attack

What if the Greeks at Troy had been Orthodox Evangelicals?
The Gallop pole says it would have changed history!

Fan Photo from Lamont Cranberry

Great Gill Giveaway Going On

New blog, "For the Cause of God and Truth" is giving away a free copy of Gill’s Collected Writings on CD Rom. They will take entries for the drawing until midnight Sunday April 12. Who knows...you might just be the chosen one!

Click here to enter!

Fan Photo from Mimi Topeka

Dear Eddie,
I was visiting the Hank Locklin National Art Museum yesterday when I noticed this painting hanging on the wall. I couldn't believe my eyes! This ancient piece proves, beyond a doubt, that you stole the idea for T&G (Tulip and Grenade) from the 17th century painter, Cruton LaToya.
What do you have to say for yourself bozo!
Love,
Mimi Topeka

Dear Ms. Topeka,
You have got it backwards! THIS IS OBVIOUSLY A FORGERY! Grenades were not invented until centuries later! And word balloons, like the ones seen in the painting, are a product of twentieth century cartoonists! Besides, did you notice the Starbucks coffee cup on the floor? I know for a fact that Starbucks coffee shops were not seen until the 18th century!
If I were you, I would apologize to me for such baseless accusations, inform the head of the museum, and send me a hundred dollars. Hope to hear from you soon!
Eddie

Big Cell

Inspired by this article at the Wittenberg Door

Sugary Sweet

To sweeten the view click here!

New Testament Roll-Up

The Hip Hop That Won't Stop

You may or may not care for hip hop.
But all you Calvinists out there will eat up
the lyrics of this talented musician
(he is a 5-Pointer)
and he lays down some Sovereign Grace doctrine
everywhere he goes.
(He even has a rappin' bio of Spurgeon!)

read some of his tunes and see what I mean:
http://lyricaltheology.blogspot.com/

I also did a "Hip Hop" gospel tract for
Good News Publishers a few years ago.
You can read every page of it here:
http://www.crossway.org/product/663575730163

Create a Calvinistic Cartoon Caption #12

Congratulations pilgrim mommy for this Arminian joke!

Hint: Have a professional artist paint this on your living room wall so that you will always have a constant reminder. Sure, it may cost you a couple of thousand dollars to do this, but if he is fast, you just might have time to win this contest! Even if you don't, your wall will be an ice breaker when guests arrive for dinner.

Best Blog Blabber

My count was 38 comments from Ralph.
Second place was Ellery with a total of 30 comments.